When it rains it pours...

(short for a novel...long for a blog...inspired by true life instances)

Sonia lives in a town almost adjacent to the big and busy city of Manila. At 39, she remained single, working in a Provincial Hospital as an Accounting staff for almost half her life. She was hired initially by the same hospital as an accounting clerk; she got the job, her first, when her mother, then a government employee working at the Municipal Hall accidentally bumped into an old friend who worked at this same hospital as a manager of one department. Had it not been a referral, she would still be buying at least two nationally circulated newspapers every Sunday and endlessly mailing out her resumes to companies who would prefer graduates from prestigious universities than take a chance on her, a product of a local college. She never knew how it is to work for other companies; she knows nothing about other industries as she is so afraid to leave the comfort of her known world and mastered routine at the hospital. To her, why waste time looking for another job when there are a lot of college graduates in the area who are more competitive than her but cannot land a job. After all, she is thirty nine and in her country, employers preferred younger people who can put in more energy and time to the job, despite being passed out for promotions twice because her boss thought she couldn’t handle bigger responsibilities, Sonia decided she will stick it out with this hospital, the only place she imagined herself working for the duration of her career. There she goes, nineteen years, with just two records of absences and no tardiness, working quietly and without complains in her little station.

Sonia keeps a small circle of friend, most of them she had known for years, co- workers basically. Her being with a sick and aging mother, her father passed away when she was still sixteen, won’t allow her free time to do much after the regular eight hour work at the hospital. Her routine is generally work, home, and church, with little extras like showbiz magazines, movies with her mother, going to market, cooking and gardening. Sonia had a friend in High school, Tony, whom she secretly adored, although they were really close, sharing secrets, problems, food, books, and neighbors at that, their relationship remained purely platonic, at least to Tony.

Tony’s family moved to New Jersey right after he finished High School. To Sonia, the day Tony left is like the whole world turned black on her. To make matters worst, Sonia’s father passed away of a stroke a year after Tony left. Five years later, Sonia heard from another neighbor that Tony married another batch mate in High School, the one whose family moved to New Jersey too a year after Tony’s family did.

Sonia’s life without Tony and her father evolved with College and her mother. Although she didn’t get excellent grades in school, perhaps because she is naturally timid, she usually gets high scores in written examination and despite being unpopular and the least teacher’s favorite, Sonia did very well in most of her subjects. She was a diligent student, and could have won a lot of awards in Accounting if she didn’t shy-out of competition. She knows this, as the quizzes and contests were mostly held in the open and she knew the right answers to most, if not all of the questions. When she finally got her degree in Accounting, Sonia didn’t even bother to ask her mother is she will be going to the CPA Review classes in Manila. She thought to herself they don’t have the financial resources to pay for the tuition or the everyday allowances as a commuter, and her lack of spirit made her think that she will end up failing the examination anyways. She heard of a couple of honor students who failed in the past and she wouldn’t want to take a chance. Her mother after all, is preoccupied with paying old debts they had incurred when her father was sick, and later the internment expenses. These, plus the monthly payment to the bank for their small house and lot which for many years, they could hardly make up to pay the principal, but made just enough payment for the interest, to keep the property from being repossessed, is too much a worry for a widowed public servant.

On her tenth year of working at the hospital, Sonia’s mother retired from work due to a weak heart and other symptoms of aging. For all those years until the present, her nineteenth year of working, Sonia took care of all the expenses at home and for the maintenance medicines of her mother. Despite the increasing cost of commodities and her meager salary in the hospital, she still managed to keep a few hundred each month in her savings account which was opened by her parents when she was just ten.

Her routine continued and every afternoon before going home, she would pass by the city market to buy food or to look for little something that would interest her, like a new hairclip or a new pair of sandals for example. And when she got what she wanted, she would always pass by this little magazine store to check out the latest showbiz magazines, and finally to buy a lottery ticket, which she always does three times a week whenever the jackpot reaches more than ten million pesos. She thought, if she could only win the jackpot, she can pay all their debts and finally claim the title to their modest house and lot. The property is very dear to her parents, and she cherished it too. Infact their house is the envy of the neighborhood because of its lovely flower and vegetable garden. The front path leading to the door is uniformly fenced with green fern plants, and the entire front yard sprinkled with Cosmos and variegated roses. The back yard is filled with plots of tomatoes, egg plants, patani, with alternating vines of upo and ampalaya. The garden kept her mother busy and going. Both her parents have green thumbs, and Sonia inherited it from them. Sonia may not be as attractive, but she is not also ugly, she’s got light brown complexion with black eyes and wears her straight black hair long. She’s the type of person who won’t get a second look but she’s got the sweetest smile and her eyes twinkles whenever she smiles. Sonia like her loving parents, were religious people and would never miss a mass except when they are really sick to catch that jeepney ride to church. She prays, at least three times a day, and every Wednesday she would recite the Novena to the Mother of Perpetual Help. It’s not important what she prays for, good hearted as she is the merciful Lord listens to her.

One afternoon, on her way home, she picked up the daily newspaper and read the portion of the lottery, her heart trembles as she saw the numbers familiar. “It couldn’t be! It couldn’t be! But it looked like…” she said to herself. Sonia didn’t even remember how she got to the jeepney and finally reached home. She just removed her shoes, threw her bag and went straight to her room to check the newspaper and her lotto ticket. She trembles and her heart pounds fast when she confirmed she won the first prize, forty five million, all in all. She was already in tears when she approached to tell her mother about the winnings. They both ended up in tears…

Sonia and her mother wanted to keep the winning a secret, they tried and although the news said the winner came from their place, the neighbors couldn’t really point out who won because they, being naturally quiet and simple, continued living their normal lives. They paid the debts and the loan to the property. They can go wherever they want or do whatever they want but they lived, just like before. Sonia still works at the hospital, and still buys her favorite showbiz magazine and lotto tickets on her way home.

A month later, Sonia’s new department manager, called her into the Manager’s office and informed her that she was promoted as Accounting Supervisor with a corresponding thirty percent increase in her current pay. She couldn’t believe what she just heard, and can’t help but cry at this very good news. Still overwhelmed with the recent developments in her career, she passed by the magazine store and bought lottery tickets. The following morning, she was escorted to her new work station, it is actually a bigger and fancier table than what she had for the past years and she was so delighted to see a congratulatory banner and some balloons from her coworkers who were so happy for her promotion. They arranged for a lunch celebration for her that day. Sonia was about to go back to her desk when her attention was caught by the newspaper sitting on top of her coworker’s desk. Eyes on the winning numbers…she whispered “it can’t be! it can’t be!”

Sonia won the first prize again, this time it is smaller than her previous winnings but still millions, twelve million after taxes. The story of Sonia’s life would go and on…and by the ways, Tony returned, now a widower without any children, looking for Sonia. He confessed that he loved her since they were in High School but was so afraid to tell her because of fear of losing her friendship. They have an altar date schedule already.

It’s hard to detect good luck – it looks so much like something you’ve earned.
Frank A. Clark

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Simple pleasure...

"We should do this more often!"

Just what is Abraham talking about? Well, it's an hour or more spent -- people watching, car watching, cracking jokes, laughing...

After church and a hefty Italian American lunch, the three of us, Abraham, Lemuel, and I were too lazy (or too full) to get-off the car and join Brack for the usual grocery shopping. Rather, with the 50ish temperature last Sunday, we chose to hibernate inside my SUV parked under a shady tree and facing the busy and crowded street of Vermont in Los Angeles. We slid-open the moon roof intending to take a nap, but such planned nap didn't happen because Abraham started asking about the taxi cars used in Europe and in Japan, he later continued comparing the performances of two cars, the Toyota and Ford sedans, and his funny recollection of seeing these cars in action. Where, when, and which car he judged best, is our little secret...it is really a hilarious story which lead into more laughs when the always observant and spontaneous Lemuel won't just give up but cracked more jokes on what he sees around.

When Brack came with his bag of goodies, we were all smiling and said..."we had fun!"
(Thanks to tiny 7.1 Megapix Canon, memories preserved, always in Mommy's purse!)

That man is richest whose pleasures are cheapest. Henry David Thoreau

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Can you read my mind?

Sounds familiar? It is borrowed from a very popular song, theme to the movie Superman One.

Can you read my mind?... I guess not…this is why I miss Buh, a long time friend, who even in the absence of words, can read my mind. She doesn’t wonder who I am because she can picture the things I’m thinking of. We are on the same wavelength, tuned to the same frequency, is more like it. I own my thoughts and my feelings but Buh can decipher and interpret them exactly as I have it going inside. Maybe because we spent most of our youth years together, the most emotional, challenging, and learning times of our lives.

But since Buh is just one person and out there are million others who can’t read my mind, I realized that my thoughts are really unique to me. No one can read my mind like Buh does, and that in order not to be misunderstood and to foster quality relationships with family, friends, and colleagues, I should be able to express myself openly, positive or negative, straightly, even confrontational, if the occasion calls for it.

In keeping with my nature of not saying anything that would offend someone else's feelings, I’ve learned one or more lessons in life, and while most people would like to forget painful encounters, I’d like to talk about mine now and let go of it forever. It is hurting to experience the rudeness of jealous people who uses people to get what they need or just have their moments at other's expense. I regret then that I maintained my silence and had I made a timely confrontational response, the pain would not have been as much and I could have felt better sooner. Yet it’s still not too late to realize that the “keep it to yourself” attitude doesn’t work all the time, and that there will be future encounters, moving forward, these I promise myself:

• I will openly communicate my positive and negative feelings.
• I will speak specifically, even if it’s offending, as long as it’s righteous
  
• I will respond timely, communicate descriptively and responsibly depending on whom I am relating to.
  

Then and only then…YOU CAN SEE RIGHT THROUGH ME

The reality of the other person is not in what he reveals to you, but in what he cannot reveal to you. Therefore, if you would understand him, listen not to what he says but rather what he does not say. Kahlil Gibran

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TO THE ONE

To the one, whose voice I love to hear,
and face I love to touch
To the one, who lets me have my way,
yet protects, and supports me in every way
To the one, who brightens up my lonely days,
and gives me strength for life
To the one, who coaches good Math,
and tucks the kids to bed each night


To the one, whose lap Lemuel and I loved to sit on
To the one, with hands so comforting

To the one, who I love to squeeze hug
To the one, who extends me more closet space
To the one, whom with I found the joys of marriage
To the one, who loved me just as I am
To the one, who means the world to me…

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

System Recovery

My home computer was paralyzed by a Trojan Zlob virus for a week and it is really a pain for me especially that I needed to download driving directions for our travel agendas. During this infected period, I tried calling Symantec Corporation to have the virus removed. I’m just surprised when they told me they will be charging me sixty nine dollars to walk me through the process. The virus is not included in their live updates and when I asked why, the technical person told me they still don’t know how the virus gets into the system, but they can cure it. Hmmm…Surely I wouldn’t pay that sixty nine dollars, it is thirty nine dollars more than my annual subscription.

Desperately wanting to restore my computer, I read the manual, for the first time (yes, Virginia! it is not my nature to read manuals), on doing a system recovery. My research however was interrupted by the many features I didn’t know, my PC has. I know I have a DVD and CD burner, a nine-slot card reader, multiple USB ports, but I didn’t know I have such incredible software that came with it. So then my desire to have the PC restored was intensified, it must be done fast, the solution a complete destructive recovery, restore the factory settings. At this point, I called HP Tech Support, only to my dismay that I will be charged forty five dollars to walk me through the destructive recovery process as my warranty is one hundred twenty days expired. No way! Am I being doomed because I’m not an extended warranty person? Options? I went to their website and downloaded the instructions free of charge, thanks to them, it is so detailed and user friendly, I am back on the net.

While in dilemma of an infected system, I learned about firewalls and various anti-spy software, a more secure internet browser with built-in anti virus and anti-spy (for free), and a couple of other things which I can do, myself, to protect my computer from viruses. I felt good and secured that my PC is now up to date and equipped with the necessary tools to prevent infection.

I myself was also troubled in the past days as if I was infected by a virus, that despite the hot weather in Southern California for the past week, the sun didn’t shine on mine. The system is corrupted and the memory is failing, problems here and there, or rather, viruses replicating itself, I need a system recovery, and so I did. Armed with a loving anti-virus Brack 2006 and firewalls of prayers, I am back to factory settings. Aside from this shelter, God sent more freebies through a friend named Debbie, I don’t know why, whenever I’m troubled, she always sends me an inspiring email that suits the current situation, Heaven must be using her.

Of viruses and malicious spies, of troubles and worries, I learned to build a firewall from a reliable source…GOD that is…comes with a free extended warranty.

I think computer viruses should count as life. I think it says something about human nature that the only form of life we have created so far is purely destructive. We've created life in our own image. Stephen Hawking

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Love on a Deeper Meaning

Time doesn't make this article old as its contents is so very true now as it was thirteen years ago when I wrote it. It'll give you an insight of why I chose this man to spend my whole life with....

A DIFFERENT KIND OF PRAYER

As the days draws near, we delight in thinking that Valentine’s is just around the corner. What makes the day exciting is the sharing of love, which is primarily what the season is all about. Inspired by commercialism, we have cast the valentine fever everywhere: roses at the streets, chocolates, concerts, dinners, and other sweet little things - are all but a show of sharing our feelings towards our loved ones. But if we dig deeper into thinking how it is to really share love without showy displays – our minds would really wonder how?...then we think of various ways.

Allow me then, to share with you a personal experience of feeling love on a deeper meaning.

One Saturday evening, after hearing mass, I asked my fiancé what is it that he prayed for, he replied, “that there will be peace on earth” – not surprised, but it sounded so unusual so I asked him, “Why don’t you pray for something specific? Something that concerns you, your life and your wishes?” And he answered, “Because everything that I wish for my life depends entirely on what I’d prayed for – Peace on earth.”

Days had passed and I still wondered over the thoughts – then I stopped upon hearing the world news, “The allied forces had fired bombs against Iraq”, the television footages showed innocent people had gotten hurt – lives had been taken, such a cruel sight – a clear indication that peace wasn’t on that side of the earth. Suddenly, there were no longer specific prayers and individual wishes, for life had been ruined and dreams shattered.

I asked myself, should all the people pray for Peace, would it be the same? Maybe the world would be a happier place to live in. Maybe there’d be no war – we don’t know. But one thing’s sure, our life and everything that we dreamed of will turn to waste if there is no peace.

This Valentine season, let’s live with the tradition, let love flourish in the air, but let’s try to indulge less in spending for commercialized expressions of it. Let’s try a meaningful way of doing this – on a general view, maybe a prayer for peace will manifest our love, not just for our loved ones, but for all the people on earth. For isn’t it what God wants of men? “Love one another” and “Peace on earth.”

As for me, things have changed; I share the same feelings with my loved one.

Now we’re two in wishing for that different kind of prayer…can I count you in?... Maria Elizarah 30 January 1993 (A DIFFERENT KIND OF PRAYER WAS PUBLISHED IN LIVEWIRE ON FEBRUARY 1993)

"The moment you have in your heart this extraordinary thing called love and feel the depth, the delight, the ecstasy of it, you will discover that for you the world is transformed."-- J. Krishnamurti

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Moshi moshi, My Memoirs of Japan

Tokyo? No it isn’t. What you’re seeing is the corner of Wilshire Blvd. and Hope Street. The location filming of the movie Fast and the Furious 3. Noticed the tire marks on the road?

It is interesting to see how the movie production people converted a busy Los Angeles Downtown setting into another major city in another continent, Tokyo it is. I can’t help myself but be amazed at how simple it seemed to be. Just like when Spiderman 2 was being filmed, 7th Street and the Metro train station underneath was New York for about a month. But interesting as it is, this set also made me nostalgic…

Flashback, memoirs of Japan…

This picture taken in front of our office building with the bicycles reminded me of the policemen I saw in Tokyo and Okayama. They don’t ride cars, they don’t carry guns, they ride on pedal bikes like this and they carry clubs, no guns. Gave me sense of peacefulness, somehow.
This picture of Lemuel and Brack by the vending machines and the lights, reminded me of the nights we, my Kumareng Fhe and some friends were roaming the streets of Tokyo at minus four degrees centigrade, admiring the lovely flowers, which seemed to me like green leaf lettuce because they are so big and fresh. I was amazed to see even flowers were sold in vending machines; I enjoyed the hot soup from there.

I was also surprised to know that Camote or sweet potato in Japan is such a popular and quite an expensive treat, especially the roasted ones. We find them everywhere in the markets all over the Philippines and buy them so cheap that is not enjoyable to have anymore. While there, it is usually sold at nighttime by vendors in white vans, and people run to get a share.

We enjoyed the convenient stores and we're flabbergasted that people will buy disposable umbrellas and throw them away as soon as they get on the trains. This is where I experienced a ride on the first overhead electronic train (as in no driver) in Asia, second to the world, I heard the first is somewhere in Europe. Breathtaking to cross over the Yodo River which they say is kind of polluted, is still to me one of the cleanest rivers, at least visually.

I can’t help but smile in front of my monitor when I flashed back to the bloopers we did at the Electronics Conference and Exhibits we attended, like attending a presentation just so to get a convenient seat to nap and getting freebies afterwards. Sashimi, fresh veggies, and a ton of gift from my sweet staff, Gracie, made my stay in Tokyo so memorable.

Tochigi, the city of my first traditional train ride and my first time to hold a snow in my hand. Can’t do this in Tokyo, so embarrassing…First time to eat Soya with soy sauce instead of the sweet syrup we are used to in the Philippines. I learned that eggs, older than a day, are considered old and not good to eat, for people there only consume eggs right from the poultry. Royal treatment, company tour, and real Fuji apples made my day.

Off to Okayama so curious about the Sento, but as fast as I get in, I went out. I can’t be a naked fish in a hot tub, I could bear the hot spring, I love hot springs in Laguna, but I can’t bear me being naked together with other people. No!no!no!no!!! Bullet train? Yes I did, from Okayama to Osaka, it’s fast but not as fast as a bullet as I expected it to be, ha!ha!ha! The view of the mountains is so spectacular, going through the mountains, is dark, of course : - )

Osaka International Airport to me is the most beautiful so far, very good architectural design, so high tech, and clean. I also love the bargain stores there, the Sanrio store is not crowded, a whole store, only one storekeeper who also posts as cashier when customers are ready to pay. Gave me the impression that Japanese are so trusting with their goods. The quest for Game Boy – this egame is made in Japan and is available at all Toy Kingdom branches of SM Shopping Centers in the Philippines, surprising enough not to find one in a major city in Japan as Osaka, thus I settled for Tomica.

Can’t forget the authentic guava tea, wearing the Kimono, the Japanese slippers, the cleanliness of the places, the politeness of the people, the telephone booths full of advertisements of you know what…

I guess, Japan will be forever dear to my heart, after all more than a decade of my career life was spent with Japanese companies. My only regret is I should have taken my Nippongo lessons seriously, four months learning Hiragana, Katakana and Kanji under Sensei Beatriz Mojica, a noted scholar, should help me a lot, but thanks to my laziness, my line remained: “Sumimasen, eigo de hanashite kudasai ma senka?” (I’m sorry, in English please?)

Travel has a way of stretching the mind. The stretch comes not from travel's immediate rewards, the inevitable myriad new sights, smells and sounds, but with experiencing firsthand how others do differently what we believed to be the right and only way.Ralph Crawshaw

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Front-of-the-line

If you love theme parks you most probably know how a front-of-the-line pass works, and incase you’re not familiar with it, a front-of-the-line pass in Disneyland Resort for example, gives you instant access to enjoy the rides or attractions without having to fall in line. Picture this, you are standing in a long line waiting for your turn to experience Indiana Jones and the Temple of the Three-Hours Wait, ups! I meant Temple of Doom (it just feels like the wait time is 3 hours to get into the ride), and comes this person flashing this card, going straight to the entrance ready for the ride, while you and hundreds of jealous eyes stare in envy, this person takes the ride, enjoy the thrills, came out happy, while you and the rest are still in line waiting for that precious turn. How good a front-of-the-line pass can be?

Last week, Abraham showed me his school’s own version of the front-of- the-line pass which he got as an incentive for having good grades. His is a privilege to bypass any line in the school Cafeteria at Nutrition (popularly known as recess) and Lunch hours. In a school of more than 2,000 young teen students trying to finish their meals within the alloted time, even batch scheduled breaks won't help shorten the lines, a front-of-the-line pass then is a relief. Whoever thought of this special type of pass, depending on how and where it is being used, is quite a genius, creative, or rather has good business sense.

I just can’t help but blast back to the days I was in High School and in College. It would be nicer if we have this kind of pass back then, even if it works only during Enrollment days where students of all disciplines would line up in front of the registrar’s office to enroll. It usually takes me more than four hours to finish a semester’s enrollment and really, skipping lunch is a pain for someone with hyperacidity. I wonder too, with all these online facilities nowadays, if you still need to fall-in line to get enrolled in a class? I just think, today’s generation is quite lucky in this sense.

If you’re like me who experienced the disadvantages of being last, you would understand why I wanted a front-of-the-line pass…My last name (maiden) starts with S, when I was still attending elementary and high school, I was among the last ones if the line or seating arrangement is ordered alphabetically. I usually end up seating at the back where I could hardly hear my teachers or my classmates especially during group discussions. I missed a lot of jokes, comments, and freebies (if you’re one of those lasts in the line, you’ll end up with what others didn’t choose) those days. This is why I was so excited to change my last name when I married, and I’m glad my husband’s last name starts with a D, what a promotion! But gone are the school days when I needed this the most. Oh well…

But despite wanting to be first, I'd also enjoy being last, if… it’s time to... get a shot (immunizations) I hate needles poking me, or to have a tooth or two extracted (never had, hope, I’ll never will). I’m sure each one of us wanted to be both firsts and lasts, where, when, and why?…It would be nice if you can click on the comments and post your thoughts.

Postcript: I can't find a handy quotation for this entry, and I can't end my blog without one, thus I came up with an original, below.

Discipline comes in many forms, waiting in line is just one of them. Maria Elizarah

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Electronic Geek

When the digital video camera and the magic microphone came out years ago, I took advantage of my son’s coming birthday as an excuse to get both, as both will be used for the party. When the camera phone penetrated the US, I was among the firsts to own one, and every year thereafter I would call T Mobile to have my handset upgraded. Same with the digital camera, I didn’t stop until I got hold of the 3.2 mega pix (3 years ago was the top of the line). Upgrade, update, the latest, these are words often in my dictionary. I don’t enjoy reading magazines about celebrities, home decorating, cooking, and fashion, as much as I loved digesting the pages of Popular Science.

My internet leisure hours will not be complete without visiting Shopzilla, Price Grabber, and Amazon.com, clicking on the link to Electronics and although I spend most of my time in these sites to check on the prices , I will be getting what I want from my favorite store (because I hate paying for shipping charges and anticipating the delivery of the item for days, I order online and pick it up from the store the same day) and that is Best Buy, or Circuit City, my second favorite, . In fact when I told my boss I am planning to have a second job at some hotel, he told me he’d rather me work at Best Buy than in a hotel because he knows it is my favorite store and I’ll have fun at work. I think he’s right.

If most women spend money and find pleasure having their hair or nails done, shopping for expensive clothes, leather bags or shoes, going to spas, or trying out the newest cosmetics and fragrances, I will be most thrilled carrying the tiniest digital camera. There’s this unexplainable satisfaction I feel having these things around.

I scrutinize the specifications and regularly read expert and customer reviews of the latest electronic products in the market whether I am buying or not. I don’t like having something on my ears, but I have an MP3 player…hmmm…

As I observed, addiction to electronic gadgets is common to men, so I can’t find a good explanation for my fondness with these inanimate objects that break down, become obsolete in a month, and gets lost. And I would really appreciate it if someone out there could enlighten me on my fascination with these "can live without, non-essential" things.

Two mini e-geeks on New Year's Eve (Like Mother, Like...)

Modern man lives isolated in his artificial environment...Arthur Koestler

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one-angle thought on weddings...

Driving off to work one morning, I heard the DJs on my favorite radio station interview a male celebrity. I didn’t get the name of this man because I wasn’t really paying attention at first, and I also didn’t know why he spoke about weddings too…maybe he’s promoting something or he’s about to get married, whatever!…Anyways, my attention was caught by his verbal treatise on weddings, particularly big weddings, and although I do not agree 100% with his idiosyncrasies, I find his exegesis sensible.

According to him, nuptials were meant to be very private, and, that nobody really cares about the wedding except those who are getting wed themselves (the latter is what I strongly oppose). But since he said it so candidly, I continued to listen. Based on my interpretation of his premise (or at least what I thought I heard, hahaha!!!) , he advised those getting married and planning a wedding party to stop making their guests suffer by giving-in to their whims and fixations like, the type and color of clothes guests should wear (please come in pastels, in floral, etc.), by buying the gifts specified on the wish lists (yes, they do have wish lists, discreetly, by informing guests of their wedding registry in selected department store or shops, some even limit their gift wish list to pricey items, just how inappropriate is that?). I think the guy made a valid point.

Why can’t the guests wear the clothes they prefer to wear, or choose the gifts they can afford, or is really meaning to give, scratch conformity. I observed too, in one or two occasions, guests are obliged to shell-out extra cash for clothes to wear and to buy the gifts they think would please the couple instead of giving the gift which comes from their hearts. So, instead of looking forward to attending the wedding, the guests dread the event, at times feel reluctant to be there, and worst of all, some end up with excuses of not showing up, instead of celebrating with the couple tying the knot.

Perceptible isn’t it? But I love weddings and I enjoy attending wedding parties because it’s romantic and I’d like to see as many beautiful brides, their gowns, the head dresses, and the flower arrangements. On a more serious note, I endear being witness to a sacred union which to me is really especial and worth celebrating. Imagine – finding two people (most of the times very much opposites), joining them, and hear them promise their lives to each other, together, forever. Awesome!

Talking of weddings, my friend Allen and husband-to-be Lowell (they maybe off for the honeymoon already as I write this piece), chose me to be one of their primary sponsors (the fifth couple I am to). Of course, they are not the kind of person who gives out wish lists, and theirs is not the type of wedding mentioned above. Allen is such a sweet and loving person and although I don’t know Lowell that much, I’m sure he’s one very good man, and their nuptial is like a dream… A garden wedding on a cool December morning in scenic Tagaytay shared with the family, closest relatives and friends, solemn and romantic, I imagined it to be. I wished I was there to witness the sweetest moment in their lives, but since I cannot be – I’m just sending them both this loving message...

The warmest best wishes for your married life. May God shower you with enough blessings to make your life together stronger. And I’d like to add, Dear Allen and Lowell that I am so honored and pleased to be one of your "Ninangs."

For those getting married, and those planning to get married in the future, I'm leaving you a borrowed line from Hallmark, "Weddings are more than a long-awaited day, it is the beautiful beginning of all the days of your life together," soooo thoughtful.

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Love came down...

Off for a four day vacation, I was hoping Monday at the stores is light and I could do my last minute Christmas shopping with ease. My first stop was Washington Mutual at 3rd Street to get some cash, not for the gifts because I usually use the power of plastic for all expenditures, but for the meals while shopping. WAMU's parking lot was full and so are the parking lots of all the stores we visited from Beverly Hills to Glendale. Had I not applied the stoic strategy of "just wait, don't drive" I wouldn't be able to find a slot to squeeze-in my tiny SUV. But I love full parking and shops full of people at Christmas time, it reminds me of SM (Southmall, Megamall, Bacoor) my favorite shopping center in the Philippines. The scene is familiar, people rush to the mall to get last minute gifts for their love ones, makes me feel I'm at my hometown.

Despite the full parking lots, the florid homes, and the festive menu however, I still feel the celebration here is a bit languor, maybe because it is a non-secular country so people greet with "Happy Holidays" (to be safe of not offending somebody) instead of "Merry Christmas" which is what the season is about, the birth of Jesus Christ.

I miss the rice cakes and the "puto bumbong" (a purple variation of rice cake cooked in bamboos), I miss attending "Simbang Gabi" (a series of dawn masses) and seeing frowsy faces trying to complete the novena of masses. I'd like to think Christmas in the Philippines is inimitable. The only country in the world where the season kicks-off officially the first day of September (because the month's name ends in "ber" same as in Decem"ber"), where radio stations play euphonious Christmas carols instead of the popular song "September Morn." Where enticing display of "parol" (a native Christmas lantern, usually shaped like a star) and lights, enhances the hopes of the zealous filipinos.

Here, there, or anywhere, Christmas is always especial, looking forward to a home filled with happiness and togetherness of family and friends. It is also a day of feasting, delicious meals, wines and drinks, and doing everything we love. It is a season of prayer, of giving and receiving (I love presents!), of reconciliation and forgiving, with memories that linger long after the season is over.

Twelve years ago on December 25, love came down on us at Christmas. Our little bundle of joy is now a young man. Happy Birthday Abraham!

Love came down at Christmas; Love all lovely, love divine;
Love was born at Christmas, Stars and angels gave the sign.--Christina Rossetti

and HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS!

Have the Merriest Christmas and the Best of the New Year from our family to yours...

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View from the top

This is one of the oldest structure in Downtown Los Angeles' Financial District. 727 West 7th is Roosevelt Building. A building with a character, and a favorite filming spot for Hollywood movies, including the famous Spiderman 2. I remember when this movie was being shot, without hesitation, I approached the production man to ask when Tobey Maguire or Kirsten Dunst will be there to shoot their parts, only to be told that the stars won't be coming for the duration of the filming. Disappointed, I asked more questions and I learned a little about second unit production filming, but that's another story. What I'm trying to say is, three years stay at Roosevelt is really worth every hour of it. It's interesting, fun, sometimes challenging, my coworkers can tell you why.

Until the move to the third highest building in the southwest, the AON Center. This is my view...hmmm...I fell in love again.

at mid day...
...where Wilshire begins

and Swordfish' helicopter scenes were shot...

where the Hollywood sign at the back adds more delight

...where happy faces means




more fun at work!





At sundown, it's even lovelier...when the skies are
clear, I'm blessed with a view of the Pacific Ocean...

breathtakingly beautiful!

The final story, the final chapter of western man, I believe, lies in Los Angeles. - Phil Ochs

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Thanks is due the Most High

Just the other night, Brack and I were talking about something we have been waiting for, something that has a big impact on our life. The agony of waiting made us worry. And I said, “You know what? If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it. I’ve tested it several times in my life before, and all we need to do is to stop worrying and learn how to surrender to Him fully. That is my problem, up to now, I still don’t know how to give up and leave things to Him.” And he answered, “ I heard of it too, a coworker told me about his own experience of lifting up everything to the Lord, just when he realized that everything is beyond his control, he did a complete surrender, and it worked.” Then we slept the night away…Two days later, the worries are gone, our prayers heard, what we asked for was granted…it does work…hence…THANKSGIVING, two grateful hearts.

Back where I came from, Thanksgiving, like Halloween is not observed at all. Rather, Christmas is the most joyous event, Christians, mostly Catholics (I am), are so thankful for. It is the day Jesus Christ was born (by the ways, it is the day Abraham, our eldest was born). But I am in the US now and I learned to embrace Thanksgiving dearly, well, it’ll be forever second to Christmas for me. I know why and how to be thankful, but I must admit, I did some readings to know more about Thanksgiving. And articles, like the transcript from As American as Pumpkin Pie by Karin Goldstein below is most helpful.

A November afternoon, 1910… Two immigrant factory workers are eating lunch. “Marcella,” says one woman to her friend, “why do we have this Thursday as a day off?” “I don’t know,” her friend replies. “Something about the chicken holiday.” This is how the mother of one Plymouth resident was introduced to Thanksgiving.

This tradition of American culture must have seemed bewildering to newcomers. As reformers pondered how to teach new immigrants how to become good Americans, many looked to examples from the past. Since the early 20th century, the Pilgrims and Thanksgiving have been used to teach both new Americans and school children about American history and values. This is just one of many ways that people have looked at the holiday over time.

Prior to the mid-1800s, Thanksgiving had nothing to do with the 1621 harvest celebration, Pilgrims or Native People. Thanksgiving started as a traditional New England holiday that celebrated family and community. It descended from Puritan days of fasting and festive rejoicing. The governor of each colony or state declared a day of thanksgiving each autumn, to give thanks for general blessings. As New Englanders moved west in the late 18th and early 19th centuries, they took their holiday with them. After the harvest, governors across the country proclaimed individual Thanksgivings, and families traveled back to their original homes for family reunions, church services and large meals.

So now, what should I be thankful for? A lot, lot, really…I could go on and on…but in order to facilitate reading I’ll be brief.

For the good blessings – this life, me and my family borrowed. My Family, my mother, my relatives, my grandparents (though in heaven I could still feel their care), and my husband’s side of the family – they are all so good and supportive, like my side of course. The material things, my friends, my bosses (except for one, I have always been fortunate to work for such good bosses), my coworkers, acquaintances, and everyone who makes life more pleasant.

For the “not so good” blessings – these are people, events, and occasions which are not so good, but taught me life’s most important lessons. It expounded my experience, enlightened me, in effect, made me a better person. Truly, God works in mysterious ways…

In summation, everything is good…for God is good and all praises and thanks are due Him.


So we’ll go for the turkey, feast on the food, chat with relatives and friends, what a wonderful day! I love Thanksgiving!
"To speak gratitude is courteous and pleasant, to enact gratitude is generous and noble, but to live gratitude is to touch Heaven."-- Johannes A. Gaertner

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on a night like this...

'Ever drove on a holloween night? On a rush hour? Downtown Los Angeles and its environs was horrible last Monday. A lot of drivers seemed out of synch - driving like frantics, slower or faster than usual, ignoring street signs.

But stupidity is not a handicap and no matter how broad-minded americans are, these drivers are really unforgiveable. Putting it on an appropriate theme - the undead rose from underneath to terrorize the city with their horrific driving styles. Makes me wonder how these people passed their behind-the-wheel tests.

The scene is totally like driving on a rush hour when the rain is starting to pour. Almost four years here and I still couldn't find a logical explanation why drivers in the city creates a big fuzz out of a soft touch of nature as showers or downpours. The streets are not only jammed by confused drivers, but accidents involving vehicle crashes are also a common sight. Why can't these ferocious drivers compose themselves and adjust to a very slight deviation from the ordinary?

Why would I flash a signal light to make my intention? Why would I regulary scan my left, right, and rear mirrors? Why look like a fool making a full stop on a full stop sign (yes I even count 1,2,3 simultaenously with scanning) before proceeding? All these safety techniques, obedience with rules and regulations, and nineteen years of driving experience is no match to a fast approaching maniac inconsiderately cutting you from behind leaving you with a deep sigh of relief that you and the vehicle you are driving, which is still being amortized, were not hurt.

Oh well...they say racing is living, everything else is just waiting.


When Brack reached home I asked why he was late, and he replied..."the streets were so bad...blah...blah...blah..." Looks like we have another complainer here.

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you and scorn in the one ahead. Mac McCleary

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defined anew...

As a Binibining Pilipinas candidate, Precious Lara Quigaman brilliantly performed during the Question and Answer segment of the pageant, brushed her way up and bagged the Binibining Pilipinas – International title and the opportunity to represent the country in the Miss International pageant in Tokyo, where she eventually outwon fifty-one other candidates from different countries around the world.

Not discounting her undeniable charm and beauty, I believed Lara won the heart of the audience, the judges most especially, the same way she swept the Binibining International title in Manila. She surpassed the other finalists through her meaningful and sincere response to the intriguing question thrown on her by the emcee.

Lara reminded me of Gloria Diaz, another Filipina with a very prestigious beauty title, Miss Universe 1969, only eighteen years old when she was crowned. Although I was just a toddler that year, I grew up hearing my folks’ comments on how smart she is and how excellently she handled the question and answer portion, which most people thought earned her the crown. Later, I was able to watch the footages of her pageant and I agree with the people’s opinion that time. She shone brightly with her insights.

A lot had changed in the country and its people since the year Gloria Diaz won the Miss Universe. The Philippines then, was a developing country with a very bright future of leading the lower level set of developing countries in Asia. Sad to say, a lot of factors aborted the development, the Philippines remained a developing country, now miles and miles behind its contemporaries. To date, the negative factors over power everything that is good in the country and its people. The good went bad, the bad stayed bad, the good is clouded and can't break through...the limelight is focused on the dark side. Very seldom, these days, that you would hear good things about the Philippines and the filipinos. This is Lara’s generation…she came out in a time and situation where you need to work harder to obtain approval, to gain respect, to prove you are worth something because you deserve it.

With Lara’s natural intelligence and wit, she was able to honor her country, her countrymen, herself most importantly. She gave a new meaning to our primary skill export. And it was heard…the loud, warm applause from the international audience proved it, bringing home the crown is an acknowledgment that we, somehow had been elevated. The challenge remain for us to sustain it…

Below is the text (taken from an email) of what transpired during the final judging in Tokyo, choosing Miss International 2005.

Emcee: "What do you say to the people of the world who have typecasted filipinos as nannies?"

Lara: "I take no offense on being type casted as a nanny. But I do take offense that the educated people of the world have somehow degraded the true sense and meaning of what a nanny is. Let me tell you what she is. She is someone who gives more than she takes. She is someone you trust to look after the very people most precious to you - your child, the elderly, yourself. She is the one who has made a living out of caring and loving other people. So to those who have typecasted us as nannies, I thank you. It is a testament to the loving and caring culture of the Filipino people. And for that, I am forever proud and grateful of my roots and culture."

Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart.

Kahlil Gibran

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goodbye $$$...

My grandmother GLORIA from my mother's side, has a big influence in my life, and even now that she is gone for almost twenty years, her memory, her words, and her values lives within me - so clear, so vivid. I hate Accounting, and I told her I won't pass the qualifying examination, she told me to just take the test and if you pass, then take the course. That is why I have a degree in Accounting.

Almost everyday of my first eighteen years, I witnessed how she valued education that much. She encouraged her children to be serious with their studies, supported them all the way, and even borrowed money to pay their tuitions fees. She did the same to me, being the eldest of her grandchildren. She would do anything just to put us in school. (In the Philippines, even though you attend a public school, you need to pay a minimal amount for tuition fee every month, and you need to pay for your food and buy your own books.)

True enough my grandmother was right, "it doesn't matter if you are poor, if you are educated, things will be easier for you" her encouragement, worked for me. Education became my priority too. Pursued graduate school, took several short courses (I still am taking one at present) and like her we (my husband and I) are trying our best to share the same value with our children.

An advocate of education, and coming from a poor family, I do not want my children to experience the hardships I went through. To my mind, I'll iron-out everything so that the passage to their dreams will be smooth and easy.

At age six, my eldest already had a fullpaid college plan for an exclusive University in Manila. So what's the twist? the plan was acquired from College Assurance Plan of the Philippines or CAP, as this company is popularly known there. It is an all filipino investment, used to be a symbol of financial security for more than a decade, but now famous for dashing hopes of parents like me, unable to fulfill their obligation due to mismanagement. The company recently received an eight year rehabilitation status from the SEC and aims to settle the obligations with their creditors first and deal with the poor subscribers like us later.

What does this mean? A filipino family's dream of sending their children to college with the invested money is stashed. Schools are no longer accepting CAP's postdated checks, parents are now borrowing from friends, from creditors who are taking advantage of their situation and charging them big interests for the borrowed money. What about the future scholars? like my son who still have six years before College? What about the hard-earned money we put aside for this plan? Isn't it not fair that this money, at least at subscription value, will not be returned to us?

Who are affected? in Cavite alone where I came from, most subscribers are my friends, colleagues at work who believes that education is so important, it will pave the way for our children's success in life. Responsible parents who prepared and set aside funds for the brighter future of their children. What now, blame the parents for wrong choice of company? Of not studying the company well enough before investing? But unless you are an insider, who knows the real thing - you couldn't tell. Accountants (we) call it window dressing - an accounting practice which understate liabilities and tend to present a better financial picture than the actual standing. Some preneed companies seemed to be good at doing this.

We are now in the US, we have new hopes, keep the children intact and on track with their dreams and the good old US and the private sector will be able to help them - study now pay later, grants, scholarships, a lot of options. Good and hardworking students have better chances here than in the Philippines. With or without CAP, our hopes are high. Although at the back of my mind, I still hope that one creditor of CAP will take over and fulfill the company's obligations, that would be a miracle. For now, it's goodbye $$$ for us...

If you are planning for a year, sow rice; if you are planning for a decade, plant trees; if you are planning for a lifetime, educate people. Chinese Proverb

Postcript: Snaps to Abraham and Lemuel, for their good grades this semester. Double snap for Lemuel who made it to the GATE (Gifted and Talented Education) Class.

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