Saturday, December 26, 2009

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

it gives back

It takes away your ease, sucks-out your energy, pulls-down your spirit, and hurts your pockets, but despite the many agonizing and unpleasant stories you might have heard or read from cancer survivors, cancer also gives back. The experience of cancer is a tormenting adversity to those who have encountered it. Hence, most testimonies, stories, and written words of the survivors highlight the rudeness of the treatments. Of how chemotherapy ruined their self esteem when the hair had fallen-out, the constant nausea, headaches, and other discomforts which aggravate the fear of developing another disease as a side effect of the treatment. A man I knew whose wife was recently diagnosed with breast cancer said, the disease robbed them of their time. I cannot impugn.


I’ve been through all of the above. By through I meant, the worst part is over. God forbid, a recurrence is not welcome. I remember the distress; in fact I have almost forgotten how to live with ease, at least temporarily. But behind this undesirable experience, an illuminative realization kicked-in. Cancer gives back. It is an admonition to consider death. It may sound morbid but hey, who would not die? Everyone in his own time will. Everyday of our lives, we live with uncertainties. Someone young and healthy could die all of a sudden, caught off guard and unprepared. Cancer survivors had advance notices. Conscious, thus, are able to shift or change their priorities in life, endowed with time to acknowledge what is really important, to appreciate the blessings around them, and to ameliorate the wrongdoings and shortcomings they have done somewhere in their past. Survivors are able to do all these things before their time to finally leave comes. Cancer is a reminder, it does not only take, it gives back.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Have you felt it yet?

Thanksgiving like Halloween is a very popular and endeared occasion in the US. After living in this country for almost eight years, I have learned to embrace Thanksgiving, although Christmas remains inimitable and will forever be the holiday dearest to my heart.


A week ago, a friend posted on Face Book, “is it Christmas yet?” A couple of friends commented, “Not soon enough.” I said, “It could be, seek you heart.” Christmas exists in the heart and manifests outside. This is my belief. It could be months and months ahead of time but a person may have felt Christmas already. Or it could be Christmas everyday for some people. Depending on whether our hearts and minds feel PEACE and LOVE, the spirit of Christmas.


When people go through pain, sickness, or hardships, it may already be Christmas Day but it’s hard for them to feel it. The year that passed, I was among those people. Bald, lonely, and weak, I couldn’t feel peace and love. I was empty even if surrounded by loved ones and material things that once excite me. But thank God, times passes so quickly and I felt Christmas early again this year. Love always comes down for me on Christmas. My older son was born on Christmas. I guess I shouldn’t have to remind myself that love is always here every time.


How ‘bout you? Have you felt Christmas yet? I mean, as in Christmas, Christmas?

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Radio's fine

Years ago when I was much younger and Walkman was not yet out in the market (please don’t spend time figuring out how long ago was it) sleep became my problem. Those days, it was not pills that cured the condition, but music. Music from a pocket-sized AM/FM transistor radio lulled me to sleep. For all the comfort that I experienced, the radio was worth the numerous canisters of double A batteries I consumed, and unlike sleeping pills, the radio dosed me off without harmful side effects. Just when I learned to adjust and live with the hassles of insomnia, it disappeared. I slept soundly at night and never used the transistor again.

At present, I am playing tags with sleep again and I know the remedy. If it worked before, there is no way it will not work again. And I was right, all I need is music. Not those coming from high-tech MP3s because earplugs bother me, music from the old-fashioned radio. I may not find a classic pocket transistor like that my mother gave me but the boom box will do.

So now at my bedside, in the quiet of the night, while the rest of Los Angeles sleeps, there’s the box turned-on so low. I could barely decipher the lyrics of the song played, but enough for me to enjoy the melodies of familiar tunes. So soft, so calming, it takes me there – to precious sleep.

Radio’s fine.

If I should write again...

Treatments had taken ease away and it became harder for me to write. Except for links to Anoop’s music, my blog was empty for the longest time ever. When I lay in bed at night, thoughts fills my head but I just can’t transcribe it. I said to myself, if I should write again, I triumphed at getting back, despite the ease that’s here today and gone tomorrow. I am writing again…Believe.

Monday, November 30, 2009

Monday, November 16, 2009

Look alike

Getting ready to cook Sinigang, a local filipino dish, I asked my younger son to grab a tomato from the fridge, he handed me a Persimmon, instead. I told him it's not tomato it's Persimmon, to which he replied..."Mommy you can't blame me, they look alike." He got a point so I just smiled.




Now comes my older son...holding the Persimmon in my hand, I told him..."I asked your brother to grab a tomato and he gave me this," to which he replied..."Oh he gave you a small Pumpkin?!"

I need Aspirin :-)

Monday, November 09, 2009

L.U.V.R. Another Anoop original



'Lovin this song :-)

Sunday, November 01, 2009

THIS IS IT!

MJ was phenomenal. I'm forever a fan.

Friday, October 23, 2009

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

a quiet, sweet, and wonderful day

...am thankful for another year

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

I heart Anoop!!!

whether he stays or not...he is my Idol. Sorry Simon, I have a reliable blackberry and home phone, I will keep on voting till you eat your words...again!!!

I'm wearing this shirt to the tour :-)

Friday, March 27, 2009

16th anniversary



...is yet in June, but the theme shirt is already on the way :-)